


Had I known how to save a life....

by SmolMo



Series: How to safe a life [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hinata Shouyou is Sunshine, Hurt/Comfort, MSBY Black Jackals - Freeform, Mention of Death, One Shot, Panic Attacks, Post-Time Skip, Roomates, Sakusa has a soft spot for Hinata, omg they were roommates, reader is a surgical intern
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:00:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27197515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmolMo/pseuds/SmolMo
Summary: Sakusa just wanted to get home and relax after a day of practice.He didn't know that you had an awful day at work and was coping with the effects of the day.
Relationships: Sakusa Kiyoomi & Reader, Sakusa Kiyoomi/Reader
Series: How to safe a life [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1988641
Comments: 9
Kudos: 143





	Had I known how to save a life....

**Author's Note:**

> Yes...I may have been watching old episodes of Grey's Anatomy and they might have inspired me a little to write this.  
> That's probably also reason I chose this title.
> 
> It's my first time writing from the 2nd person point of view. So I don't know how it turned out.

Sakusa opened the door to the apartment the both of you shared, kicking off his shoes in a swift motion, dropped his bags, and put the key back into a little bamboo bowl.  
With a swift and practiced hand, he tugged his mask away from his mouth and threw it in the bin right next to the front door.

This had been another exhausting day of practice. Not only were the MSBY Jackals prepping for the upcoming Volleyball season Bokuto, Miya, and Hinata had been a triad of annoyance once more. Sakusa was just looking forward to another relaxing shower. He still didn’t trust that the gym showers were clean and a nice meal and, overall, a relaxing evening. Speaking of food. He noticed the lack of scent and noise in the apartment. The curly-haired man would have assumed that you would have been making dinner right now…but you weren’t visible...in fact, he couldn't hear you anywhere in the quiet apartment .

You and Sakusa had been living together ever since the both of you graduated from college. You had been flatmates in college, sharing an apartment on Campus with two other people, but Sakusa had asked you, claiming you were clean and reliable. Despite your different schedules, you actually managed to co-exist very peacefully together as you both shared the same wish not to have too much ruckus at home and keep it minimalistic, and followed the cleaning and food making schedule…  
Was today his turn? Had he mistaken? Sakusa checked their Schedule in the hallway….no…today it had been your turn to prep dinner.

For you especially, being a first-year surgery resident, life was tough right now: The changing shifts and long hours of work required a clean house, and Sakusa valued your cleanliness (not to mention the supplies of high-quality disinfectant you brought home). Komori had kept teasing the both of you, but this whole situation was totally platonic. You had to focus on your studies, and Sakusa had his carrier. 

Yes, true, he somewhat enjoyed your company. Found your wits and intelligent remarkable, and yes…he found your expression whenever you study quite adorable even if you had the terrible habit of chewing at the end of your pencils. Not to mention it was good to have a doctor as a friend who could provide him with excellent care.

Sakusa decided to dump his gym clothes in the laundry room to get a load of dirty clothes started and noticed that you had already thrown in clothes, your scrubs very prominently visible, into the washing machine and set the program. It was just waiting for him to throw in his stuff and press the button. 

Another thing, he liked about you- living together with you. Practical and forward-thinking.

Maybe, she is at the store getting something for the late-night cravings she had kept up since college. Sakusa wondered about the lack of food smell. Then he saw the grocery bags on the counter in the kitchen. Mostly unpacked except a lonely tomato that must have rolled out and splashed on the kitchen floor, where it lay.

Ew. Sakusa thought and wondered why the heck you hadn’t cleaned up that mess. Where the heck were you anyways? This was so unlike you to keep the kitchen untidy. He sighed thinking: Freaking girl probably forgot to buy some chocolate chip cookies in your car and caught up with your elderly neighbor who kept asking if they had set a marriage date? Senile old woman. This was all platonic.

He went to his room and grabbed some comfortable clothes and made his way to the single bathroom and had his hand on the handle when he heard it. Your subdues but panicked breathing.

“Y/n?” he asked and heard your sharp intake of breath 

“Sakusa?! I-I’m…alright?” you said quickly, trying to overplay the desperation in your voice. your 

“I’m coming in!” Sakusa had heard the panic in your voice, and the fact that you’d called him by his last name had given him prove enough that you weren’t alright. His eyes widened a little as took the scene in.

You were sitting…now cowering on your shins on the bathroom tiles in nothing but your dotted bathrobe. Hair still damp from your shower, frantically rubbing your hand together. Your clothes had been scattered around the bathroom floor and were soaked in small puddles of water. Next to you, a half-used bottle of disinfected the strong smell heavy in the air overpowering the usual peppermint and lemon scent of your shampoo that lingered after your showers. 

Sakusa, his hand still on the door handle, looked at you and realized that you looked awful. You sat there like a clump of misery. Eyes nose red from crying just as the palms of your hand, which you kept frantically rubbing together.

“What happened?” Sakusa asked, and you twitched at his tone. 

Shit…. he was annoyed. He probably wanted to have a relaxing evening and take a shower, and you’d made a mess in the bathroom. He’d probably have to clean it before use now and.

“N-nothing…. I’m fine!” you muttered and was surprised by your own croaking voice. The tears and sobs had ebbed down, leaving your throat dry and itchy.

“Yeah…I can see that,” Sakusa said and came closer and knelt before you. “Y/N,” he said, your name in a surprisingly soft tone. “What happened?”

You met his eyes and tried to wield his gaze, but it didn’t last long. Today just had been an awful…awful shift.

“My…..my kid….” You said, “You know the little boy I was talking to you about…the cardio kid…he died today…”

Just saying it out loud made the tears in your eyes well up again. Damn it….and it was on your watch. You were only a first-year intern…and your attending surgeon had been in another operation when your patient, a freaking 8-year-old boy, had gone into cardiac arrest…that stupid cardiomyopathy and you were on your own...you had to crack his chest on your freaking own while they were paging other attendings. If only they could have come quicker…if only he’d survived a few days longer…maybe they could have gotten a donor heart

…..damn it…you still saw the blood on your hands the tomato had reminded you of it as well.  
You had to get it off…all it…the stickiness…you just needed to get the stains off. You frantically turned around and grabbed the bottle of disinfectant, squeezing the liquid out into your palm again, and started rubbing over and over again till you couldn’t feel your hands anymore. Not enough…no…

“Y/N…” Sakusa said softly, but you didn’t listen. You rubbed and rubbed your hands dry and red “Y/N!” he added again a little more forcefully, but you rubbed and rubbed “Y/N!”  
Sakusa yelled and grabbed both of your wrists in hands with strength. “Look at me!” he demanded firmly as you flicked your eyes to his. He had always been taller than you…but right now, he was kneeling in front of you so that your eyes were leveled.

“It is not your fault!” he said calmly. “You have done everything for that little boy. Do you hear me?”

You felt your eyes well up again with tears and shook your head, not having the energy to fight with Kiyoomi. Not today…

“Omi…please, I need to get clean. I need to”

“You are clean…” Sakusa said softly, the grip in your wrist softening as he turned your hands so that your palms were facing up. “You are clean…. I wouldn’t touch you otherwise…” he said and gently stroked your palms with his thumbs. They had calluses from playing Volleyball but were warm and firm. The touch sending out electric currents over your skin. 

You felt something in your chest-thumping. Maybe you had to check yourself out for tachyarrhythmia. Because there should not be a reason for your heart beating so fast... You and Kiyoomi were friends, just friends...and why the heck did you even think about that right now???  
“Get up y/n,” he said, tugging taking your hands, and pulling you up. He hesitated, then put a hand on the back of your head and pushed you towards him, so you bumped into his chiseled chest. He then, a little awkwardly perhaps, proceeded to rub his hands in small circles on your back for a moment then you heard him say, “Get dressed and sit down on the sofa…I’ll cover dinner.”  
His voice vibrating in his chest.

“Are…you…” you mumbled into the fabric of his shirt.

“Yes…” he stated, and you stepped back from him…a little flustered by the sudden intimacy. Sakusa had never been one for physical contact.

“Um….sorry about all this,” you said, snatching up the clothes that you had frantically thrown off and dumped after your little panic attack hoping that Sakusa had not seen your underwear. You were mortified enough. 

The volleyball player had, however, and chose not to mention it. He also realized that you weren’t wearing much…or anything under that robe of yours and tried to avoid his eyes as you bend down to snatch a soaking t-shirt from the floor. Luckily the robe covered your behind but hinted at what was hidden under the terry cloth.

Fuck! He cursed in his mind then shoved the clothing he was holding into your arms.  
“Take these and change… ’ll be prepping dinner…” he stated and turned on his heel to leave the bathroom.  
Sakusa chopped the vegetables with satisfaction and maybe a little too loudly, but chopping felt good. He decided for a quick stir-fry with udon, which he knew was your comfort food and also grabbed two chocolate puddings from the fridge and put the food on the small table in front of your TV and turned on the prerecording of that stupid show you liked so much.

“Are we really watching the Great British Bake-off?” you chuckled as you came into the living room. Dressed in Sakusa clothes. 

“Y-yes,” he said, looking at you for a second before clearing his throat. “Dinner is ready…”

You tilted your head. “That was quick…don’t you want to go have a shower first?”

“I’m alright,” he said and sat down. “I would like to eat actually…”

You started eating in silence, nodding in approval of the stir fry, and watched the Bake off…glancing your eyes at the spiker, you smiled as he watched the series, he claimed as stupid, with intellectual interest just like he watched the replay of his games.

“How was practice?” you asked, leaning back onto the sofa.

“Okay…” he muttered, obviously annoyed at something

“What happened today…Miya-san trying to a backflip to imitate Bokuto-san?” 

“No…” Sakusa sighed. “Bokuto tried to throw Hinata over the net like a Volleyball…. Miya caught him before he could fall, and the two of them fell into the net, so it crashed…”

You busted out laughing as the scene picturized itself in your head.

“It’s not funny!” Sakusa looked at her while slight amusement danced in its eyes, “Really…not funny Hinata could have seriously been hurt.”

“You really like him, don’t you” you smiled and pulled your legs closer to your chest. “I never heard you being so protective over another player.”

“Hinata-kun is…” Sakusa said with the hint of a smile, “precious...Yeah, albeit stupid…”

“Introduce me to him the next time,” you said, grabbing the chocolate pudding. “It’s been a while since the boys came over…”

“And I’m glad about it,” Sakusa muttered and thought of the mess Miya and Bokuto had left in their apartment. They had been so drunk that Sakusa had to call you and asked if you could provide and insert intravenous hangover relief.

“Sorry about that scene earlier,” you said after finishing your pudding, “and thanks for all this.”

“No worries,” Sakusa said, glancing at you from the corner of his eyes. “Tough day? Wanna talk about it…”

“It’s just….it has been a tough week,” you mumbled. “Cardio is hardcore…and I just find everything overwhelming a little….I had to talk to the boys’ parents after surgery…that was hard…and I’m sure that I’ll never forget…” you haltered and put your chin on your knees.  
Sakusa nodded and didn’t say anything. Which you were glad. The truth was any other words like. I understand you…would have been untrue…he wouldn’t understand the struggles just like you didn’t really have a clue about Volleyball and training even though he had tried to explain the game to you plenty of times.

“Maybe you need an outlet…we could start running together again,” he suggested.

“Yeah, and I’ll watch you run leaps around me…no thanks…” you laughed, and even Sakusa smiled a little.

“Anyways,” he said and stood up to grab the plates, “You go watch your show…I’ll clean this up and take a shower after all…”

“Thanks for everything, Omi,” you mumbled and focused on the screen.

He just nodded and picked up the dishes to clean them in the kitchen, and went to have a shower. When he returned, the show was still on, but you had fallen asleep on the couch rolled up in a ball, mouth opened softly breathing.

Oh, for heaven’s sake Y/N, he thought how many times did he have to tell you to get into your bed when you felt sleepy. The spiker sighed and grabbed the remote to turn off the TV. Then proceeded to put an arm under your knees and the other one around your shoulders. 

Sakusa then carried your sleeping figure, warm against his chest, to your room and laid you on your bed, and tugged you in. Glancing at the thick anatomy book left open on your nightstand, a page on muscle groups, hidden inside it a manual for Volleyball. So she had been catching up on the game. He smiled as he saw you move and change your position mumbling something in your sleep when a strand of hair fell into your face. Sakusa bent over and softly tugged it behind your ear.

“Good night, Y/N,” he whispered as he glanced over you sleeping and smiled before shaking his head and getting the heck out of there…this roommate thing was purely platonic after all.


End file.
